The Naked Man Problem and the Secret to Never Forgetting Numbers
Crap. Where did I put my stuff?
Every time I go to the gym, it’s the same thing - a sea of identical lockers. And I have no idea which is mine.
I can’t solve this by picking a favorite, because there’s always a potential naked man standing next to the one I want. This isn’t a big locker room. And I like my space free of other naked people.
(Maybe it’s because of that time in college when I was just trying to find a bathroom in a campus building and accidentally walked into the locker room my chemistry professor used after racquetball. Naked chemistry professor. That image is burned into my brain forever.)
So yeah, there are plenty of times I come back to that locker room and have no idea which locker is mine. I know I’m not the only one. You can see the panic of guys opening locker after locker, trying to find their stuff.
But here’s my secret. I actually do know how to remember mine.
Swans like boating on a sailboat while smoking pipes.
There it is. My locker: 246.
Swan = 2
Sailboat = 4
Pipe = 6
It’s just a story.
You’ve probably heard about a “memory palace.” It’s that technique where you remember things by placing them in imaginary rooms in your mind. You think, “That sounds cool,” and then never try it because it sounds like work.
It’s not, really. But here’s something even easier than a memory palace.
The One-Minute Memory Hack #
Just turn numbers into a story.
Use images or symbols that are fun for you - something weird, vivid, even a little ridiculous. Your brain loves to remember weird.
Here’s my personal number dictionary for inspiration:
| Number | Symbol |
|---|---|
| 0 | Donut |
| 1 | Candle |
| 2 | Swan |
| 3 | Heart |
| 4 | Sailboat |
| 5 | Hook |
| 6 | Pipe |
| 7 | Axe |
| 8 | Snowman |
| 9 | Hammer |
And yeah, I know - a 6 and a 9 kind of look the same depending on whether you’re standing on your head. So come up with your own unique pair if that bugs you.
The trick is: you’re not forced to use anyones. Use your own. The only rule is to keep them consistent. Once your brain associates “2” with “swan,” it’ll never forget it.
For example, there’s a lock in our house no one can ever remember. I don’t know the code either. Except… I can axe (7) the head off a swan (2) and hang its beating heart (3) on a hook (5) — and boom, it opens.
Yes, it’s gross.
But I’m never forgetting it.
Happy Halloween.